- Anti Joke

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Fat? Jesse Z

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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