Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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There's a study that the population of Americans are very high in America.

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Knock knock. Its open.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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ok everybody to make this more simple we all have to line up alphabetically by height.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

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roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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