how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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Boy: Your father must be an alien, because there’s nothing else like you on earth! Girl: *whispering* please don't tell anyone we are trying not to be noticed...

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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