If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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What comes after Friday? A ?.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops