whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Obama = ebola

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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No it doesnt..

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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