An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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