Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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