What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops