What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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A miserable man committed suicide.

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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