(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

thumb_up thumb_down -2

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops