Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

No your aunties a joke

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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