69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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^ That's not even funny ^

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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What's big and purple? Barney

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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