Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

Boner

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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