A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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what does the sloth say to Jonah reincastle? nothing Jonah is the sloth

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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