How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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it was all Tagart

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops