Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

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12 niqqa 12.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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What didn't the artist buy at Best Buy? A Ziploc Bag full of AIDs infested zebra pubes.

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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