How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

Knock Knock the door's open, come in

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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