Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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