The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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A white man, a black man, and a Mexican board a plane. The white man watches the on-flight film. The black man watches the on-flight film. The Mexican also watches the on-flight film. At the end of a long flight, they leave the plane and go do whatever it is they planned to do at their destination.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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