A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops