Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Bitch

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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