My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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Bitch

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops