Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Take wrong turns

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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A car walks into a bar.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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