What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops