Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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