What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bucket of chicken? A lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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