Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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A bar walks into a man

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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What's 50 feet tall, wears glasses and plays dungeons and dragons. A nerd, I lied about the 50 feet part.

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What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

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- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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What do you call a generally un likeable person who has a habit of drinking in a bar? A Bastard.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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