Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

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all these jokes are horrible now

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops