Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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