How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

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Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the b\Batmobile? A: "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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How many people were trampled on Black Friday this year? Not enough.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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what purple and jolly barney who doesnt love his charactorial warmth!# not weird

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What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A tragic drowning victim. And later, food for sharks, probably.

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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Knock knock Who's there The police The police who? Ma'am your son is dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops