When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

ugvvvvvv

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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