Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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