your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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Who is a pussy ass bitch and is and has a chode? - Jeff Misner

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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