What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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