You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

A house comes around the corner.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

What is the difference between Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers? One's name is Jason, and the other's name is Michael.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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