Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

Seriosly. too much sex again?

"hey do you know the date" "58"

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

The Big Band Theory

What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

Alien vs. Predator = Evil Staplers vs. Evil Jamaicans

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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