An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

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whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

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Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

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A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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