Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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i like turtles

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Justin Beiber

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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