What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do a Mexican and a elephant have in common? Aside from the fact they're both alive beings, they share the same kingdom, phylum, class and the fact of both being alive beings, each other are in constant contact with the environment, they both share affectionate ties with partners of their species, being them from the same family, breeding partner ou even just alive beings of the same especies of each one.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops