Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

Why did the gay guy go in the bar? To find some hookers

How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

why did the zebra cross the road?

What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

Q: What happened when lost John lost his crack cocaine? A: He bought some weed.

Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...