How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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What's 2+2? Fish

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

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A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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Dig Bick Your dislexic

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

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Women's Rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops