What do you call a baby girl that has grown up? A women

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man gets a new job working for his boss. The boss gives him more and more work and less pay. The man finely gets fed up, beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later speculated that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops