When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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