Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Granny porn!

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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A man walks into a bar. As he walks in, numerous people turn their heads in awe. Is it... it can't be. It's Paul McCartney, the famous musician! "Oh - I'm not Paul McCartney". The man then said. "I just look a lot like him. Sorry." "Awww. That's a shame." said John Lennon, disappointed.

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what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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