Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why is the earth mad at the moon? cause the moon mooned the earth

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops