A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

breasts

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

thumb_up thumb_down +15

One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops