Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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It's The Only Crayon The illustrator had?

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A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

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Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

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What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops