What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

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A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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