why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How does a printer work? You plug it in.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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9/11

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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Sex

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit halfway by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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