Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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