What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

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silver bullet?

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Women's Rights

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Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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the mean terrorist said "i am going to kill your mother" that mother is now dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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