What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

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A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

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WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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